Reaching the last month of the year makes me a bit sad. It's like a remembrance that I have wasted those passing months. True, I stayed to my goal, so why would I consider those times wasted? Still, telling yourself you have done great is like lying that your knowledge is as much as the pile of books in your home. You can relate to these right?
I felt that I haven't done enough. This year, I have not save a soul, nor did I involve myself in profitable business or being extraordinarily active in environment campaign or join any FREE-GAZA peace demonstration. I haven't done much to contribute to these world.
What about self-contribution? I have not earn my own money, I have not achieve the 4.00 flat in the last semester. I did not score 20 out of 20 in the last quiz. I have not change my wardrobe, bought the Sailormoon collections that I have long for, did not memorize the Quran, did not actively learn Arabic.
So what have I been doing?
Despite the passing time where humans are supposedly becoming more mature, and more intelligent, politicians still fight like cats and dogs about who's best to govern the country while they forget about the people that makes up the country. And war still rages on despite the big influential country talks of peace and their ability to stop them. Bitterness against what have passed still have not fade.
What have time taught us then?
Life. Some may say. What about life? Living. What about living? Breathe. What about breathing? Oh shut up! No!
Why? Just like how good you've supposedly live, then just answer the simple questions. But we can't.
Because these questions doesn't stir our surface, it stirs our inside. That tiny voice in us is making us think. However, to some people, thinking is a pain because it demands action. So long as the action is not made, so long will the guilt in your heart will not fade. But don't worry, having that guilt shows that deep down you're still human. There's part of you that still wants to do good.
So don't push that healthy nerve cells away! Let them connect! Think! Observe with a cleanse heart, evaluate with a fair judgement, and decide with a resolute action.
Time does not wait for us. Don't wither with the flow of time. Bloom! Go against the flow of all your peers. There is no such rules that says they are always right and you will always follow.
Be creative. Be innovative. Make a different!
And strive, strive to be ahead of time. To be leading your own time, to tell time "I am not sadden by you. I will turn back and smile at you, and look ahead with pride for winning and leading your race".
If you can understand that simple analogy, that's cool.
If you can't.... well try harder.
So everyone, it's already the last month of the year. Do something! Make a difference. Don't let yourself advance to next year while having nothing achieved this year.
With that, until next time..
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