Recently, I did that "desk makeover". If you don't already know bout that, you can check it here.
One of the objective of me doing all that, is to make me gain spirits so that I study super duper well. And so that I won't procrastinate.
Well, it worked. I reached my objective.
To move forward in this cycle of life. See the tiny details in life. Mourn. Groan. Giggle. Laugh. Smile. Strive!
Showing posts with label studies. Show all posts
Showing posts with label studies. Show all posts
Thursday, October 4, 2012
Tuesday, September 18, 2012
Puteri Gunung Ledang Parody
Oh, did I ever tell?
I was part of the Drama & Theater co-curriculum group. Haha, desho? Don't laugh though.
Well anyway, here's the script that I wrote:
do tell me if it's any good ^^
To read => Puteri Gunung Ledang Parody
I was part of the Drama & Theater co-curriculum group. Haha, desho? Don't laugh though.
Well anyway, here's the script that I wrote:
do tell me if it's any good ^^
To read => Puteri Gunung Ledang Parody
Thursday, June 28, 2012
Another Step
Well, hello everyone^^ How long has it been since I last posted? .. A month?! Oh even worse, my last real post was on February. That's 4 months ago. So... did you miss me? Blee, coming from you guys, I don't think you do.
In 4 months, a lot have happened. Duh, that's just obvious right? Unless I live in a cave though. But I do feel that cavemen adventures are even more interesting in 4 months. Well, that's what I feel, not like I ever actually meet any cavemen before. Maybe it'll be interesting if I could date one. Tee hee.
So, any idea what I'll be talking 'bout today?
First, let me do a recap. (Now it sounds like I'm actually giving a speech - lol) Well, I went to work after I got my driving license. Oh yea, I got my driving license!!! Thrilling isn't it^^ huhu~ Cool, right? Or, did I already told you guys bout that? Dang! That's why you're not jumping in excitement like I do. Or maybe you're just jealous~ :p
Oh, back to the story.
So, I went to work part time. I am a part-timer but I actually worked full time. Imagine my pay~ hehe, plus all the overtime, I'm basically draining my boss, since she have to pay me higher than her full-timers. I'm bad, aren't I? Whatever, I only worked there for 2 months anyway. Haha, cause' after that I enroll in University^^
Enough the straying,
Ok, I'm not really typing this to share those working time where I have to smile and greet my customers all day. There were some interesting events but let's just skip that until another time when I feel like recapping that.
So, as the picture has changed, you should have able to guess, right? I'm in university now^^ huhu. Ok, yes, maybe I'm over excited. Maybe. Maybe not. No, honestly, I AM!! I'm already here for a month but that doesn't really decrease my excitement. I totally love the library. They call it IRC (Information Resource Centre) though.
I'm pretty much relaxed now, that's why I'm a bit hyper. I've just finished my test so I planned to do some more studying but then I'm too happy to even focus. Thus, I decided to update this blog to throw all the unspoken words. Duh, you can't really scream in the library.
So, all that typing earlier was just introduction. Haha, tired of it? What to do, that's just how I ramble. Let's get back to business.
When I first came, most of the seniors here - my orientation facilitators - I think, are good people. It made me wonder why everyone was worrying 'bout social issues. Well, that is until I saw myself what happen after orientation. Good, kind, caring seniors do exist. However, the opposite probably exist in larger numbers. The numbers that I was blind to when I first came. Well, not just seniors though. Even my peers have their social 'misguidance' I guess. Haha, what a way to put it.
Oh, anyway, I was involved in the self-reflection night (I think they phrase it wrongly - in any case, it's what we know as Malam Kebudayaan). I was the narrator for our sket. Or pantomime. I'm not too sure what it is actually. I met a few interesting people, some of who I befriended. I seriously love them. They're fun and sometimes, although it's not as how it was with Sasha, our conversation will be mind provoking. And you know I love that sort of conversation. I have to admit, I thought I won't encounter this sort of person, but I did :)
Oh, then I met Beras friend. Have I told you guys bout him? He's a friend I met while working. He did say before that his friends are fun but I was never too convinced how fun is that. Afterall, my degree of fun have always been different than the rest. But they're fun in a way :) Although honestly, I don't understand most of their conversation, but just listening to it is relaxing. Not that I could explain to you why anyway.
Oh the assignments? To be honest, I think my secondary school gave even more homework than the lecturers here. Still, it's pretty tough and energy-draining to finish up the assignments. I guess that's cause' there's so much reading, researching and thinking to be done in one piece of paper. That's a shiver.
As for clubs, I joined Rakan Masjid, literally translated as "Friends of the Mosque". :) And, there's an 'and' there. Haha. I'm also part of SIFE. and HOT. Well, you can google SIFE so don't let me do any amateur explaination 'bout it. HOT stands for Heart of Tronoh. Tronoh is a place, by the way. The University is in Tronoh. And HOT is the university bulletin/magazine. I'm the reporter^^. Well, pray I can still study excellently.
This is my leap. I hope I do very well. Pray for me.
I'm having fun everyday. I mean it. Only, I'm also very tired everyday. Haha. Well, I think I'm pretty toned down a bit so I should resume studying. Later, guys^^. And girls. Hehe.
P/S : by the way, I do not own the pictures. Since I don't have a camera, I just 'borrowed' the pictures. Credit goes to the owner.
In 4 months, a lot have happened. Duh, that's just obvious right? Unless I live in a cave though. But I do feel that cavemen adventures are even more interesting in 4 months. Well, that's what I feel, not like I ever actually meet any cavemen before. Maybe it'll be interesting if I could date one. Tee hee.
So, any idea what I'll be talking 'bout today?
First, let me do a recap. (Now it sounds like I'm actually giving a speech - lol) Well, I went to work after I got my driving license. Oh yea, I got my driving license!!! Thrilling isn't it^^ huhu~ Cool, right? Or, did I already told you guys bout that? Dang! That's why you're not jumping in excitement like I do. Or maybe you're just jealous~ :p
Oh, back to the story.
So, I went to work part time. I am a part-timer but I actually worked full time. Imagine my pay~ hehe, plus all the overtime, I'm basically draining my boss, since she have to pay me higher than her full-timers. I'm bad, aren't I? Whatever, I only worked there for 2 months anyway. Haha, cause' after that I enroll in University^^
Enough the straying,
Ok, I'm not really typing this to share those working time where I have to smile and greet my customers all day. There were some interesting events but let's just skip that until another time when I feel like recapping that.
So, as the picture has changed, you should have able to guess, right? I'm in university now^^ huhu. Ok, yes, maybe I'm over excited. Maybe. Maybe not. No, honestly, I AM!! I'm already here for a month but that doesn't really decrease my excitement. I totally love the library. They call it IRC (Information Resource Centre) though.
 |
| Information Resource Centre, University of Technology PETRONAS |
 |
| The inside view (night) |
 |
| The outer view (night) |
I'm pretty much relaxed now, that's why I'm a bit hyper. I've just finished my test so I planned to do some more studying but then I'm too happy to even focus. Thus, I decided to update this blog to throw all the unspoken words. Duh, you can't really scream in the library.
So, all that typing earlier was just introduction. Haha, tired of it? What to do, that's just how I ramble. Let's get back to business.
When I first came, most of the seniors here - my orientation facilitators - I think, are good people. It made me wonder why everyone was worrying 'bout social issues. Well, that is until I saw myself what happen after orientation. Good, kind, caring seniors do exist. However, the opposite probably exist in larger numbers. The numbers that I was blind to when I first came. Well, not just seniors though. Even my peers have their social 'misguidance' I guess. Haha, what a way to put it.
Oh, anyway, I was involved in the self-reflection night (I think they phrase it wrongly - in any case, it's what we know as Malam Kebudayaan). I was the narrator for our sket. Or pantomime. I'm not too sure what it is actually. I met a few interesting people, some of who I befriended. I seriously love them. They're fun and sometimes, although it's not as how it was with Sasha, our conversation will be mind provoking. And you know I love that sort of conversation. I have to admit, I thought I won't encounter this sort of person, but I did :)
Oh, then I met Beras friend. Have I told you guys bout him? He's a friend I met while working. He did say before that his friends are fun but I was never too convinced how fun is that. Afterall, my degree of fun have always been different than the rest. But they're fun in a way :) Although honestly, I don't understand most of their conversation, but just listening to it is relaxing. Not that I could explain to you why anyway.
Oh the assignments? To be honest, I think my secondary school gave even more homework than the lecturers here. Still, it's pretty tough and energy-draining to finish up the assignments. I guess that's cause' there's so much reading, researching and thinking to be done in one piece of paper. That's a shiver.
As for clubs, I joined Rakan Masjid, literally translated as "Friends of the Mosque". :) And, there's an 'and' there. Haha. I'm also part of SIFE. and HOT. Well, you can google SIFE so don't let me do any amateur explaination 'bout it. HOT stands for Heart of Tronoh. Tronoh is a place, by the way. The University is in Tronoh. And HOT is the university bulletin/magazine. I'm the reporter^^. Well, pray I can still study excellently.
This is my leap. I hope I do very well. Pray for me.
I'm having fun everyday. I mean it. Only, I'm also very tired everyday. Haha. Well, I think I'm pretty toned down a bit so I should resume studying. Later, guys^^. And girls. Hehe.
P/S : by the way, I do not own the pictures. Since I don't have a camera, I just 'borrowed' the pictures. Credit goes to the owner.
Wednesday, September 28, 2011
Getting There, dear SPM
Let's see...
I've decided to halt all online activities until my SPM is over. That would mean that this would be the last post for the month and I will only continue after SPM which would be umm... in after 2 months plus (?).
I've decided to halt all online activities until my SPM is over. That would mean that this would be the last post for the month and I will only continue after SPM which would be umm... in after 2 months plus (?).
---
As it is now, [I've receive several test papers] my trial results are very disappointing. Even to myself [!]. That's why, the alarm in me had rung and I really need to brush myself up for the upcoming exam. I don't want to regret it later.
Since I've decided that, the moment you see this blog is updated [unless it stated - Yatta!! Exam's over in December], I've broken my own oath. Very despicable, no?
There are quite a few things I wanted to post since I'll be holding myself back for the next two months (tee hee - 2 months IS really very very long for me).
- Please, anyone who could translate BRIGHT - 1年2ヶ月20日, please help me do a PROPER translation!!
- I'm still gonna be active on Twitter so.... to those who I follow : [this is a very selfish request] could you tweet things that could lift up fighting spirit?
- About the dramas I'm planning to download,... hmm.. [ONLY if my standard grade rises SUPERBly] I might download it on holidays (might, might!! hopefully I could stand NOT TO)
How come I have a lot of things on my mind before I start typing and now all of it seems to fly away??
Oh, oh, and after SPM, I thought... maybe.. since I like watching anime and dramas and reading manga soo much, maybe I should create a blog to summarize all that I watched/read??
I mean like detailed summary.
I know the feeling of not being able to watch something at that time, yet we wanted to know the latest of what happen so... [of course it'll be full of spoilers] but it's for those who really can't stand not knowing, right?? kiki, that's just what I think I want to do....
For now, I'm gonna strugle with all I might and [pray] all will end well~
As for the rest,..
I've already forgotten what I wanted to say..
So,..
This is goodbye,
I guess.
Hope whatever One Piece updates that I'll be missing will be great so that I have MANY chapters to read with great pleasure.
Hope I have enough money to buy MS Gundam Seed and MS Gundam Seed Destiny ORIGINAL Set (DVD only) by the end of the year.
Hopefully Ojakgyo Brothers turn to be a worthwhile drama^^.
Hopefully I could buy the two album I've been longing for a while now~
Hopefully I could really get extraordinary and exceptional results for SPM.
Hope I have time to help NaO download Giseang something drama..
Hopefully I [magically] get a set of T-shirts consisting of all One Piece characters (that would be super cool)
Hopefully I won't be depressed thorough these demanding(for me) times.
Hopefully I won't faint in exam hall again.
Hopefully they released Ouran High School Host Club DVD (drama) by the end of the year - together with the english subs - so I could buy it^^
Hopefully EVERYTHING went as planned and I don't stray from my own promises.
Buh bye
currently listening to :
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
"Solemn"
Am I serious? I meant as a person. I don't think I am. I might not have been too cheerful lately, that I know.
But that Elle-like girl... [it's about time I give her a name = Emmie; let's just go with that]
On the second day of my trial exam... (I think it was on the second) she passed by my table and saw my ID. And she was so excited at first, thinking about a comment she ought to give. But then her expression gradually dropped. She stared at my picture and said,... "Hey Adefuwa, you look solemn".
I just smiled at that moment since I don't quite know the meaning of "solemn" but I guess she picked up expression pretty fast.
So Emmie asked me, "You do know what that means right?"
Now here's one kind of annoying question people tend to ask, that is, including me. That kind of question implies that you realize that someone doesn't know and yet you still have to ask.
It might not be at all annoying if I hadn't guessed that "solemn" probably doesn't have a very good meaning.
So, [dejectedly] I replied a "no". She became a bit nervous but "get on with it!" was the only thing I thought of. So she told me that it means serious, but sad. Or something like that.
Would you like it if someone told you that? No, I wouldn't. But she was just being honest and it's not like she mean any harm. I know she didn't, at the very least. So I simply said, "Oh, I never knew~" and shrugged the whole thing off.
Now, I know Emmie's a smart girl. Heck, she is! A lot! [I'm pretty much jealous too]. But I can't possibly accept that sort of comment, I thought. But the truth is, I have accepted that. When she said I looked solemn, I thought of how that word sounds so right (part of the reason why I smiled). However, I don't like to think I'm like that the very least~ haha.
The most funny part is (at least to me it is)... although I said I don't like it, what bothers me isn't the fact that she said I looked solemn. It's the meaning of that word. It's like I couldn't believe what she said was the real meaning of that word.
So with this dilemma, I went and search for the meaning in Oxford Dictionary..
And here's what I got:
I was hoping she was wrong.
Maybe that's the real dilemma.
After all, it's not like Emmie and I are close enough that she actually thought of that. And even if I am like that now, I can't believe that I was like that 5 years ago. (That picture was from five years ago)....
"Things" started happening to me after that picture is taken. I remember the dates well. So I can't be like how she described me, right?
I think I was pretty cheerful back in those years^^ Very, except when Sasuke and Naruto was fighting when Sasuke left the village.... haha^^ (Those are really precious memories)
But someone ask me before (though not directly) , "So are you a serious person?"
Blergh, what's that supposed to mean? I said I don't know. Haha~ I just didn't feel like answering him at that time.
And many times too,.. I've heard some people talking and they describe me as someone serious. I doubt I am.
Define serious for me then! I checked on the word and I still doubt I am. It didn't really bugged me though. I just want to know which part of me is viewed as serious. Could it be that I don't joke? Hmm... that too isn't very true~
For now, I'm content and happy because tomorrow I don't have class^^ But I still need to study for Account exam on Thursday~
But that Elle-like girl... [it's about time I give her a name = Emmie; let's just go with that]
On the second day of my trial exam... (I think it was on the second) she passed by my table and saw my ID. And she was so excited at first, thinking about a comment she ought to give. But then her expression gradually dropped. She stared at my picture and said,... "Hey Adefuwa, you look solemn".
I just smiled at that moment since I don't quite know the meaning of "solemn" but I guess she picked up expression pretty fast.
So Emmie asked me, "You do know what that means right?"
Now here's one kind of annoying question people tend to ask, that is, including me. That kind of question implies that you realize that someone doesn't know and yet you still have to ask.
It might not be at all annoying if I hadn't guessed that "solemn" probably doesn't have a very good meaning.
So, [dejectedly] I replied a "no". She became a bit nervous but "get on with it!" was the only thing I thought of. So she told me that it means serious, but sad. Or something like that.
Would you like it if someone told you that? No, I wouldn't. But she was just being honest and it's not like she mean any harm. I know she didn't, at the very least. So I simply said, "Oh, I never knew~" and shrugged the whole thing off.
Now, I know Emmie's a smart girl. Heck, she is! A lot! [I'm pretty much jealous too]. But I can't possibly accept that sort of comment, I thought. But the truth is, I have accepted that. When she said I looked solemn, I thought of how that word sounds so right (part of the reason why I smiled). However, I don't like to think I'm like that the very least~ haha.
The most funny part is (at least to me it is)... although I said I don't like it, what bothers me isn't the fact that she said I looked solemn. It's the meaning of that word. It's like I couldn't believe what she said was the real meaning of that word.
So with this dilemma, I went and search for the meaning in Oxford Dictionary..
And here's what I got:
- formal and dignified
- not cheerful; serious
- deeply sincere
I was hoping she was wrong.
Maybe that's the real dilemma.
After all, it's not like Emmie and I are close enough that she actually thought of that. And even if I am like that now, I can't believe that I was like that 5 years ago. (That picture was from five years ago)....
"Things" started happening to me after that picture is taken. I remember the dates well. So I can't be like how she described me, right?
I think I was pretty cheerful back in those years^^ Very, except when Sasuke and Naruto was fighting when Sasuke left the village.... haha^^ (Those are really precious memories)
But someone ask me before (though not directly) , "So are you a serious person?"
Blergh, what's that supposed to mean? I said I don't know. Haha~ I just didn't feel like answering him at that time.
And many times too,.. I've heard some people talking and they describe me as someone serious. I doubt I am.
Define serious for me then! I checked on the word and I still doubt I am. It didn't really bugged me though. I just want to know which part of me is viewed as serious. Could it be that I don't joke? Hmm... that too isn't very true~
(((!!!@@@^^@@@!!!)))
YOSH!!!!!
Tuesday, September 6, 2011
BM tomorrow
As the title mentioned, I'll be having my trial BM paper tomorrow~
It's good that I have just gotten healthy and well again a few hours ago.. huhu
It's good that I have just gotten healthy and well again a few hours ago.. huhu
I have been on a fever for 4 days (?)..
But I'm still so-very-scared because my KOMSAS [Malay Literature] sucks!! And my Malay Grammar too T^T... what do I do????
Still, while I'm waiting for my cousin BM paper to be e-mailed to me [she's not from the same state I am, so she's having her paper early - NOT TO WORRY, I don't cheat], I stole some time for blogging^^ ehehe *//*
If I I wanted to say was about my exam, then aren't my life dull? Exam, exam, exam..... huuuh~ where's the fun in reading a blog if that's all it said, eh? I think so too... So, that is NOT the reason why I'm blogging right now~ huhu
You see, I went to NaO's house this evening, just for the sake of fetching my dad's "muruku" [a type of snack]. Now here's another side-story before I go into the main one.
During Raya Aidilfitri [the first day - I think], I invited my friend AND her family to come. Well, since I mentioned NaO, you could've guessed that it was her. And so she came...she stayed for a long time actually^^ I felt just a little bit guilty because I'm keeping her from her family when the first day are supposed to be spent with your family. And so, her family came later on when all my distant family had dissapeared to their respective home~ haha, I like that"dissapeared"..
Here's the best part: I have known her mom for quite some time so I must admit I don't mind being shameless in asking for food to be cook -for me^^. Well, I'm her daughter's friend after all. Haha, who cares??Right? NaO, if you're reading this, don't be mad^^... But the thing is,.. that day was my dad and her mom first, FIRST meeting and he shamelessly ask for "muruku". He ASK for it. It's not like she said, "If you like it, I could make it".. No, no, no~ he ask for it!!
Well, I'm not mad cause' he ask for it~ I'm basically sulking 'cause he got it.. >,> HE GOT WHAT HE ASKED!!! I haven't even gotten my "tosay"... T^T
THAT's just the side-dish for the main menu^^
Now here's the main menu:
My, my~ Sienna only visited NaO's home for like, a few hours last year (I think it was last year)... and her mom is praising her like she's an angel >,> behh!!! Okay, I got to admit, my eldest sister is kinda' sweet and kind... and humble (they praise her for this), but! people should really know not to praise someone in front of their sister.. haixxx,.. I'm not jealous, I just didn't really know how to respond.. Well, I didn't want to say, "Yes, my sister is very very kind and humble" to NaO's mother... No matter how kind she is, she's still the dinosaur sister I've known since childhood. The one with veto power T^T.
And how can I said, "No, she's not like that~ She enforced her will on the younger siblings, and magically we follow without any objection.. maybe just a few grumbles.. And she was really mean, when I viewed her back as a child.."? There's no way I can say that!! That's so one-sided view~ ANd that would make me sound like a brat T^T And it's not like all of that is true >,> ahaha...
So yea, I ended up smiling and nodded.
So get it Sienna-neechan?? When you come back here, you better come and see NaO's mother^^
I wonder if I would miss her more one day.... rather that this house I'm living in.. Of course I'll miss my dad^^
But all of it didn't matter^^
HAHAHAHAHA
I still got my own share of "muruku" in the end^^!!!
HAHAHAHA
I mean, our share of muruku...
But anyway, pray I do well in my trials
~InsyaAllah~
Wednesday, August 24, 2011
Find One Piece in the NEW WORLD
Haha~ don't be fooled by the title^^ kikiki
Hehe~ Thanks^^
There's no summer here but well,... it's just the same anyway^^
So,...
I'll take on the advice^^
There's no summer here but well,... it's just the same anyway^^
So,...
I'll take on the advice^^
Wednesday, August 17, 2011
SPM Trial Timetable
.... for my state, at least..
here goes:
*the blacken space means I'm NOT taking the subjects....
*the peach coloured space are THE IMPORTANT subject I'm taking...
T^T I hope I'm ready......
here goes:
*the blacken space means I'm NOT taking the subjects....
*the peach coloured space are THE IMPORTANT subject I'm taking...
T^T I hope I'm ready......
"tee hee" = Sense of Urgency
Hmm... where do I start?
Well, since exam is so too near, well, [2 weeks is pretty near....] our school decided to create a program where all the final year student grind their mind to think of only how to answer the exam papers.. It's already the second week since this so called Sense of Urgency program started.
Today was dedicated to Chemistry and Additional Mathematics...
My weakest subject: Chemistry
My favourite subject: Additional Mathematics (not that I'm that good at it)
Anyway, I just realized that Chemistry wasn't that hard... although realizing that doesn't make it easy. AND Add Math wasn't that super fun.. It still is fun, it's just NOT SUPER fun... and it's quite hard... and I though anything with numbers are super easy.
I guess I shouldn't underestimate the power of numbers that had been making many people gone mad regardless genius or not.
This rambling must have made you bored..... well it bore me too,... but somehow, I'm having fun studying~ I've known of its fun since long ago but haven't felt it for sooo many years.
Well, I'm glad I do have fun now. At least it's [hopefully] not too late.
I have had the weirdest dream in this past few days. It was queer... not that I haven't had anything like it before... it's just that it's been coming back MORE frequently than ever.....
Is this some sort of sign?
I have been getting peaceful sleep nowadays~ I guess ignoring everything around you ease up a bit of your tension. Attention: this is NOT a good way to overcome your problem, so don't follow my lead! Though it's not the very best way to handle things, I'm not the very best human too. So let me do it my pace, ok?
HOWEVER, despite my oh-so-fantasy about having the most peaceful night ever, one cannot deny that I DO occasionally still have sleepless night... I worry a lot about it at first.
That is until...
Yesterday(?).. some anonymous girl (sorry girl, I really don't know you) stood in front at the assembly in school and gave out and article about "sleep". I don't really remember all of it since my head were focused on "I don't wanna stand here"... But along her lines, I remembered my sleeping problems and thought... It's nothing much~ afterall, occasional sleep problem occurs to everyone~
So practically, I 'm feeling pretty good^^ if you minus all the stack of things I ignored~ huhu....
Well then, goodnight~ It's pretty late here~
Well, since exam is so too near, well, [2 weeks is pretty near....] our school decided to create a program where all the final year student grind their mind to think of only how to answer the exam papers.. It's already the second week since this so called Sense of Urgency program started.
Today was dedicated to Chemistry and Additional Mathematics...
My weakest subject: Chemistry
My favourite subject: Additional Mathematics (not that I'm that good at it)
Anyway, I just realized that Chemistry wasn't that hard... although realizing that doesn't make it easy. AND Add Math wasn't that super fun.. It still is fun, it's just NOT SUPER fun... and it's quite hard... and I though anything with numbers are super easy.
I guess I shouldn't underestimate the power of numbers that had been making many people gone mad regardless genius or not.
This rambling must have made you bored..... well it bore me too,... but somehow, I'm having fun studying~ I've known of its fun since long ago but haven't felt it for sooo many years.
Well, I'm glad I do have fun now. At least it's [hopefully] not too late.
I have had the weirdest dream in this past few days. It was queer... not that I haven't had anything like it before... it's just that it's been coming back MORE frequently than ever.....
Is this some sort of sign?
I have been getting peaceful sleep nowadays~ I guess ignoring everything around you ease up a bit of your tension. Attention: this is NOT a good way to overcome your problem, so don't follow my lead! Though it's not the very best way to handle things, I'm not the very best human too. So let me do it my pace, ok?
HOWEVER, despite my oh-so-fantasy about having the most peaceful night ever, one cannot deny that I DO occasionally still have sleepless night... I worry a lot about it at first.
That is until...
Yesterday(?).. some anonymous girl (sorry girl, I really don't know you) stood in front at the assembly in school and gave out and article about "sleep". I don't really remember all of it since my head were focused on "I don't wanna stand here"... But along her lines, I remembered my sleeping problems and thought... It's nothing much~ afterall, occasional sleep problem occurs to everyone~
So practically, I 'm feeling pretty good^^ if you minus all the stack of things I ignored~ huhu....
Like I said, don't judge me just coz I don't handle things well..
Sorry, that wasn't phrase well,...
Judge me if you wish,
Scold me if you must,
Like me if do not hate,
and
Accompany me along the way,
because it's neccessary.
That's a pretty ugly rhyme..
and it didn't feel quite right too...
whatever~
I've looked through some universities I thought of going but... hmm....
Oh, and by the way~ Sienna gave Ien and myself new clothes^^ and shoes~ pretty cool right? It's for our birthday... hehe
Arigatou^^
Arigatou^^
Well then, goodnight~ It's pretty late here~
Thursday, July 21, 2011
Back on the track
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
Accounts are hard. But they're super satisfiying once you get it right. Super. I mean it. It's really a head-ache to go through accounts but when you get it done and right, it make you feel like flying in the clouds and tremendously happy. That's why I'm glad I'm taking accounts and came to the class today.
To those who were concerned by my sudden 'run-away' from everyone.... hmm... how do I put it? I mean by the sudden silence I've been purposely... no.
To those whom I've been avoiding and kept silence in these few weeks,
Thank you for your concern.I'm not having problems actually. I just didn't want to talk about anything. There's something bugging me since ever, and I wanted to sort it out. I didn't want anyone's word to affect my decision so I decided to keep my mouth shut. That's all there is to it.
It's been cleared out now. Again, no.. the problem have not been sorted out just yet. I don't think it will in the near future. It might take [high possibility] the rest of my life. And this thing is making me insane.
Well,... though that certain problem is not solved, and I don't want to be dragged on by it and unabling me to move forward,.. I decided to leave it aside.
It is not the best solution.
But it's the only one I can think of for now.
So anyway, my head is a lot clearer. I'm not going to let myself be strayed again. I have found what i wanted to do, though it's only a short-term plan. A plan is still a plan, so whatever.
I'm going to try my best to stick to it. I'm setting my priority right now. And for that, I'm not gonna bother with anything else.
So forgive me if I say "No" to everything.
And remind me if I ever said "Yes" to something that might waver my determination.
It's not that I don't like the goal I'm setting. It's just that I don't see it yet. Well, I think that happens to a lot of us.That's why this time, I want to do it right.
##############################################################
Let pray it turn out really well........
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
Tiresome Worries
Have been feeling rather restless these past few days....
It's been two days already since Huninis not talking to me. Well, it's not like I bothered much about it. Huninis was always, inconsiderately and immaturely moody. Gah! That person could coil up herself in her room for the whole month or year for all I care.
And my life goes on.
Elle had been a real help. He's explaining things to me now. Well, I just hated that he's nagging bout my studies. Even the always-a-yes Fritz who's been on my side since ever started to nag about studies. I just don't feel like it.... Haixx.... it's not that I don't realize it's importance. But really, I can't seem to find a reason as to why I need to. No, I know I need to. But later on, what am I pursuing? I really have no idea.
Let's say that LaRich prediction that I get excellent result due to 'my hardwork' [which aren't really true] really come true, then what's next? University? Even if I said I'll go with the flow and applied one, I don't really have any particular course I wanted to take. I don't really like the idea of being a dull adult who works for the sake of working like an adult and for money. I actually dreamt of being a passionate adult who really strive to do the best with my carreer choice. But really, what's my choice? Nothing seems to really motivates me. Maybe I was born dull. Huhu.
Elle too, got angry at times when I refused to study. Well, that's my bad. He only tried to do the right thing. Fritz on the other hand was being carefull? I wonder if his act is what people called careful... Well, he's been treating me awfully nice but not in his usual disgusting manner. He was being such a gentleman. Heh.heh.. Just when I'm very pleased and supper happy, he'll start looking at me trying to give the best smile he could and "maybe you would like to study now?". Well, I wasn't down just cause' he said that of course. The fact that he tried is visible. Hohoho.. But you see, Fritz is still Fritz no matter how much he change. I just can't help but dissapoint him with a 'no'.
But still, Dev and Elle was right. I really need to start focusing right now. I'm not a genius who could score without much effort. Nor do I have a reliable memory. I need to start focusing on the big exam which is like 6 months away. Huuuuh~
It's been two days already since Huninis not talking to me. Well, it's not like I bothered much about it. Huninis was always, inconsiderately and immaturely moody. Gah! That person could coil up herself in her room for the whole month or year for all I care.
And my life goes on.
Elle had been a real help. He's explaining things to me now. Well, I just hated that he's nagging bout my studies. Even the always-a-yes Fritz who's been on my side since ever started to nag about studies. I just don't feel like it.... Haixx.... it's not that I don't realize it's importance. But really, I can't seem to find a reason as to why I need to. No, I know I need to. But later on, what am I pursuing? I really have no idea.
Let's say that LaRich prediction that I get excellent result due to 'my hardwork' [which aren't really true] really come true, then what's next? University? Even if I said I'll go with the flow and applied one, I don't really have any particular course I wanted to take. I don't really like the idea of being a dull adult who works for the sake of working like an adult and for money. I actually dreamt of being a passionate adult who really strive to do the best with my carreer choice. But really, what's my choice? Nothing seems to really motivates me. Maybe I was born dull. Huhu.
Elle too, got angry at times when I refused to study. Well, that's my bad. He only tried to do the right thing. Fritz on the other hand was being carefull? I wonder if his act is what people called careful... Well, he's been treating me awfully nice but not in his usual disgusting manner. He was being such a gentleman. Heh.heh.. Just when I'm very pleased and supper happy, he'll start looking at me trying to give the best smile he could and "maybe you would like to study now?". Well, I wasn't down just cause' he said that of course. The fact that he tried is visible. Hohoho.. But you see, Fritz is still Fritz no matter how much he change. I just can't help but dissapoint him with a 'no'.
But still, Dev and Elle was right. I really need to start focusing right now. I'm not a genius who could score without much effort. Nor do I have a reliable memory. I need to start focusing on the big exam which is like 6 months away. Huuuuh~
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
The Ramble on Luck, is it pressure... ?
Previously, I thought... "Gah! I'm lucky most of the times^^"
But then most of the time, no,.. not most... It's just in me.. I don't believe in luck.
So I ponder about it : Why do the word "luck" comes out of my mouth so easily when I really don't believe in it. Coincidence too,.. not that I don't believe it but I believe that everything has it's reason so to call something coincidence is really unreasonable to me.
Yuuko from XXXHolic catch phrase which been quoted many times by her fans had it's truth..
There are many thing in this world that could make me gone mad.. For instance, that simple word "luck". Haaaa~ I really don't know what am I to do with myself T^T.
So, if luck means chance, then it's a good thing right? I'm not too sure~ we shouldn't really depend on chances alone afterall. The world is not too kind that they'll give out chances to everyone. What about the advice "take chances". Or the bad education of "take other people chance"? Survival means taking chances. But what kind of chances do we take to remain a good person? Like I have that hope anymore... When it come to this, I wonder if taking other people chances is a bad thing.. It doesn't sound bad if you hear it in another point of view.
For instance, someone who have the chance would be fortunate, right? In other words, lucky. And we call the person who didn't get it unfortunate or unlucky. But under some circumstances, the A person were not able to take up that chance at that moment so the B person took it. And the A side would say, B stole their chance. Well, then their unfortunate. But seldom people say that they're unlucky.Why? Maybe cause they got the chances in the first place. But B side would say that B is great at looking for chances. Would that be called fortunate? And can we substitute in the word and say "B, you're great at looking for luck!" It would sound odd indeed.
But then again, "chance" are not used in that way only. And giving situation, luck is not the right word probably.
If you're getting bored or complicated, or you think I'm crazy right now.. that that's fine. I already told that this is just one of the ramble that's been disturbing me so I need to spit it out. Who force you to read it in the first place? Haha
How bout' the use of luck in cheer? Instead of saying "Good luck", shouldn't one say "Do your best! I'm rooting^^" or shorten it to just "Do your best", "Give all you got" and etc. That why I love the word "Ganbatte!!" Short, and simple. It is a saying used to encourage people to try hard before a performance to say good luck.But then again, even that word had a little essence of luck. At least it literally means do your best, I guess~
Haa~ I wonder if I talk too much of nonsense....
But then most of the time, no,.. not most... It's just in me.. I don't believe in luck.
So I ponder about it : Why do the word "luck" comes out of my mouth so easily when I really don't believe in it. Coincidence too,.. not that I don't believe it but I believe that everything has it's reason so to call something coincidence is really unreasonable to me.
Yuuko from XXXHolic catch phrase which been quoted many times by her fans had it's truth..
Nothing in this world is a coincidence. Everything is Hitsuzen*.
(xxxHOLiC)
*Hitsuzen meaning inevitability, destiny, or fate, as being the driving force in the world
Since I believe in god,... or to be more precise, I'm a muslim and I believe in Allah, I know that everything in this world is fated. He planned it all. Of course, there are reasons for everything.
Now I'm starting to crap and stray from what I originally want to say..
The thing is, it's bugging me a lot. The word "luck". This might be an unnecessary rambling but I just had to spit it out of my head once and for all.
By definition, LUCK means :
| 1. | events that are beyond control and seem subject to chance; fortune |
| 2. | success or good fortune |
| 3. | something considered to bring good luck |
So, if luck means chance, then it's a good thing right? I'm not too sure~ we shouldn't really depend on chances alone afterall. The world is not too kind that they'll give out chances to everyone. What about the advice "take chances". Or the bad education of "take other people chance"? Survival means taking chances. But what kind of chances do we take to remain a good person? Like I have that hope anymore... When it come to this, I wonder if taking other people chances is a bad thing.. It doesn't sound bad if you hear it in another point of view.
For instance, someone who have the chance would be fortunate, right? In other words, lucky. And we call the person who didn't get it unfortunate or unlucky. But under some circumstances, the A person were not able to take up that chance at that moment so the B person took it. And the A side would say, B stole their chance. Well, then their unfortunate. But seldom people say that they're unlucky.Why? Maybe cause they got the chances in the first place. But B side would say that B is great at looking for chances. Would that be called fortunate? And can we substitute in the word and say "B, you're great at looking for luck!" It would sound odd indeed.
But then again, "chance" are not used in that way only. And giving situation, luck is not the right word probably.
If you're getting bored or complicated, or you think I'm crazy right now.. that that's fine. I already told that this is just one of the ramble that's been disturbing me so I need to spit it out. Who force you to read it in the first place? Haha
How bout' the use of luck in cheer? Instead of saying "Good luck", shouldn't one say "Do your best! I'm rooting^^" or shorten it to just "Do your best", "Give all you got" and etc. That why I love the word "Ganbatte!!" Short, and simple. It is a saying used to encourage people to try hard before a performance to say good luck.But then again, even that word had a little essence of luck. At least it literally means do your best, I guess~
Haa~ I wonder if I talk too much of nonsense....
I guess Ace's death really got into me T^T
Well, to those who actually read this until the very end, which I planned to be here.. Thanks a lot~ It would be better if you could help me by leaving some comments AND follow me^^
But then again, maybe you don't want to hear these rambling~ tee hee >,<
I'm gonnna study right now and pray for the best for mid-year!!!!! がんばりたい!! がんばれます!! Luck is often not on my side.. not really.. I've been getting good fortune if it's not home related... so I'm not gonna depend on luck!! Everything is already fated but hardwork is not without results so I'll do my best and look forward to my result^^~
sources:
Thursday, March 10, 2011
Talking Again ^^
Guess what? Elle started to talk again ^^. He's still unpleasant as ever like normal, thank God. For now I don't think I wanted to ask him what happened to his this past few weeks. Let him be natural with me again for as long as he wants. And when he's ready to talk, then I'll listen. However, when I think back at it, I think it was really my fault that made him gone quiet. It must be the remark I made.
I had a feeling that whenever I tried to be serious, I mean over serious or the exact opposite, he'll be disagreeing with everything. Then, since he doesn't argue with me, he chooses to play silent. If my theory is true, then it worked. I hate Elle for always getting things right. He started talking when I was feeling like throwing all the school work away. He told me to think straight and he called me stupid. That's first. We'll it's not like I actually listen to him. I ignored him and tried, TRIED to take a nap. But suddenly he came to me and stared. Then he sigh, looking at my papers and told me that he'll help me with it. Even right now, though he doesn't agree with me using the com. while doing homework, he's still waiting until I finish typing and get back to my work.
Thanks Elle. It'll be a long night since I got a lot of those papers but if you really want to accompany me until I finish all of it then I'm really happy and have nothing else to say but thanks ^^
I had a feeling that whenever I tried to be serious, I mean over serious or the exact opposite, he'll be disagreeing with everything. Then, since he doesn't argue with me, he chooses to play silent. If my theory is true, then it worked. I hate Elle for always getting things right. He started talking when I was feeling like throwing all the school work away. He told me to think straight and he called me stupid. That's first. We'll it's not like I actually listen to him. I ignored him and tried, TRIED to take a nap. But suddenly he came to me and stared. Then he sigh, looking at my papers and told me that he'll help me with it. Even right now, though he doesn't agree with me using the com. while doing homework, he's still waiting until I finish typing and get back to my work.
Thanks Elle. It'll be a long night since I got a lot of those papers but if you really want to accompany me until I finish all of it then I'm really happy and have nothing else to say but thanks ^^
Friday, March 4, 2011
Good news, BAD news
I'm really very annoyed and mad. My anger has reach its peak. Luckily for that baka Huninis, I hold it so that it won't go over the limit. I wish I could throw her in the ocean right now. If not, just set her to fire. God, why is she Uranna's wife anyway. I shall be patience and endured whatever that ***** did for Uranna's sake. I really want to kill her. No, that would be too much. I hate her enough to not care what she'll become~ I'm not gonna dirty my hands for her pathetic, of no importance life.
Let's just talk on other things :
Good news is, I'm going for Chess competition with Elle/Eli girl. Bad news is, though it's suppose to be a sure thing, but the Froggie-sensei just add another girl in. So now, we had to compete each other first before 2 people gets to go for the competition. Unlucky me, I'm not in the chess club, and had low chance of getting chosen. Grr, now I'm mad again.
So, good news is that I manage to be busy in a good way. Bad news is, I'm getting envious of Elle/Eli girl 'cause she's new yet she's busier than I am. In a good way. And that's bad because I was part of the reason that she got all these chances yet now I'm jealous for actually giving her the chances. Why is all the good news only one sentence? Grr...
Good news is, I'm getting diligent again and wants to do my homework and studies properly. And this happy news lift my spirit so much that I turn on the radio quite loud. Bad news is, because of that, that Huninis ***** cursed and accused me of twisted things! Ahh, forget it!!!!!
Another good news is that plan of going to the Old Folks Home is progressing well, after the many push I did. Yet, bad news is, one of the teacher in charge is NOT doing her job, putting us on hold, and wanted unreasonable things that could hurt other when she want others not to hurt her student and self. And making me mad, and annoyed and kinda' lost my respect for her. Sorry for all teachers out there, but please understand, your students are human. They have feelings too. They have the amount of task they could handle too. And note this : I was told that we could actually sue the teachers and school if they give too many work until we're unable to play, laugh, and have enough sleep. Of course, I had no idea if that's true. I was told that it comes under child's right.
Oh, and I failed my Physics exam. Luckily, I'm a good kid who finish her homework and did an excellent work on notes. Thus I got bonus marks and ended up not failing. But it's still a shame though.
There's so much I want to say but I better get back to my homework if not I'll get lazy again.
I'm listening to Yubiwa by Maaya Sakamoto
Let's just talk on other things :
Good news is, I'm going for Chess competition with Elle/Eli girl. Bad news is, though it's suppose to be a sure thing, but the Froggie-sensei just add another girl in. So now, we had to compete each other first before 2 people gets to go for the competition. Unlucky me, I'm not in the chess club, and had low chance of getting chosen. Grr, now I'm mad again.
So, good news is that I manage to be busy in a good way. Bad news is, I'm getting envious of Elle/Eli girl 'cause she's new yet she's busier than I am. In a good way. And that's bad because I was part of the reason that she got all these chances yet now I'm jealous for actually giving her the chances. Why is all the good news only one sentence? Grr...
Good news is, I'm getting diligent again and wants to do my homework and studies properly. And this happy news lift my spirit so much that I turn on the radio quite loud. Bad news is, because of that, that Huninis ***** cursed and accused me of twisted things! Ahh, forget it!!!!!
Another good news is that plan of going to the Old Folks Home is progressing well, after the many push I did. Yet, bad news is, one of the teacher in charge is NOT doing her job, putting us on hold, and wanted unreasonable things that could hurt other when she want others not to hurt her student and self. And making me mad, and annoyed and kinda' lost my respect for her. Sorry for all teachers out there, but please understand, your students are human. They have feelings too. They have the amount of task they could handle too. And note this : I was told that we could actually sue the teachers and school if they give too many work until we're unable to play, laugh, and have enough sleep. Of course, I had no idea if that's true. I was told that it comes under child's right.
Oh, and I failed my Physics exam. Luckily, I'm a good kid who finish her homework and did an excellent work on notes. Thus I got bonus marks and ended up not failing. But it's still a shame though.
There's so much I want to say but I better get back to my homework if not I'll get lazy again.
I'm listening to Yubiwa by Maaya Sakamoto
Friday, February 25, 2011
Just Finished
Just Finished! Just finished exam today~ Just finished being scolded for telling the truth about how hard Physics exam yesterday. Just finished quarreling with Elle for keeping quiet. Just finished being slightly happy after seeing my Quran teacher. Just finished getting annoyed with Ien. Just finished from shopping with grandma. Just finished having headache thinking about the best thing that I could present someone. I don't want to do the bad movie thing : I'm the best gift for you. As if I'll ever know that!
Right now, I'm listening to IU - The Story Only I Didn't Know.
Right now, I'm listening to IU - The Story Only I Didn't Know.
I'm thinking of composing a story for the "Teacher's Day Children Story Writing" competition. But the due date is 1st March. Great, it's soo far away that I can relax... Yeah, right! I have to get started now. But how can I if I'm typing for this blog right now?
Tazia didn't know that I have a blog until yesterday. Its's not surprising since I have no followers yet. Haha, it's so stupid to laugh since it sounded sad. And I can't say that it's not even when it really is not... I'm in the school magazine team now so i'm pretty busy with school stuff. Actually, not yet. But going to be since the loads of work will start on march.
Oh, G.NA Black and White won the 1st place for today Music Bank. Too bad I don't have Animax or MTV. At least I could listen to Japanese songs too. I'm suppose to have this learning trip to Segi College and KDU in Penang tomorrow but it seems that it was postponed to some other time, who knows when. I just hope that it's not 2/4 coz I have planned that that day, my club members will be going to the Old Folks Home in Taiping. And I really want it to be successful since I'm club president. And I was the one planning it all.
I brought some chocolates for Sasha today since she loves chocolates. But silly me, I forgot she went to Cambodia for the weekend. Weekends! What a holiday. I wish I could afford that kind of holiday trip. I am jealous. But not to the point of envy. Sasha went to India a couple of times too. Elle must be jealous of her. I know he wishes to go there too though I have no idea why.
By the way, I met an Indian boy last year. Sharpener, that'll be his name. I wonder why his voice is so deep that I keep on remembering him. And yeah, Elle remind me of him. Elle had this dark feature like him except that Elle is cold and have a smooth face while Sharpener is friendly and with freckles. The thing is, I've been remembering him from time to time. Almost like Joo Won, his voice. But action, no way! Joo Won was more aggressive. Of course, I don't think I like him or anything like that. it's just that it's bugging me the fact that I see him in Elle. And I see Elle everyday! And Eli, you know him? No, you don't. He's a character I made in a story. The truth is, I made the Eli character based on Sharpener. But his name came from Elle's name. Huhu, I should stay away from Sharpener but he's my mom's student and coincidently, I see him everythime I went to my mom's school.
I hope this feeling will also be gone, over with. End. Fin. Finish. But not just finish, yet.
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
Exams
Have you ever heard of exam stress? Yeah, of course you do if you're staying n school. Well, I have to listen to speeches on this topic ever time there's an exam coming up. Duh, they don't want students to be in stress, obviously. However, though I never really care since I never experience it, I'm starting to care now.
I have a problem with stress, examination stress. Do you think I'll say that? I got Elle and Fritz and LaRich and Dev with me. How can I ever had those stress. [By the way, Elle still ain't talking]. The thing is, I'm worried by the fact that I don't have any stress at all. And now, I'm depressed by the fact that I never experience exam stress. It's stupid and stupid and all the more stupid, says Fritz. I feel like smacking him but it's true. I should be glad, I think. Yet I'm not.
Reasons :
Back to the exams again. My Elle/Eli friend was having it hard on our history paper today too. And guess what? All I thought was, "I want to show her the 3rd poem I did for Joo Won". When she's worried about the hard questions on the paper. It's not that I think the paper was easy, it was hard for me too, but I can't help but trying to show it to her. In the end I did not. I felt like if I ever did do it, she'll give me this surprise look and said, "We're in the middle of exam and that's all you could think of?" I don't want her to think that I'm too lazy or too smart. Simply because I'm not.
That's all about my exam problems. I don't think it have anything to do with exams now T.T ~
By the way, I decided to set up a new page for poems and short stories ^^ .
I have a problem with stress, examination stress. Do you think I'll say that? I got Elle and Fritz and LaRich and Dev with me. How can I ever had those stress. [By the way, Elle still ain't talking]. The thing is, I'm worried by the fact that I don't have any stress at all. And now, I'm depressed by the fact that I never experience exam stress. It's stupid and stupid and all the more stupid, says Fritz. I feel like smacking him but it's true. I should be glad, I think. Yet I'm not.
Reasons :
- I think I'm not serious with my studies.
- I'm pitying those who actually have the stress yet they don't score very well [I felt super mean]
- I don't feel like getting near any books (except novels) when exam gets nearer.
- And truth is, I want to feel like I'm seriously worried with my inconsistent mark
- I'm not the best student
- I'm not particularly good in most subject except Maths
- I'm just an average student (with no failed subject so far however not one excellence too)
Back to the exams again. My Elle/Eli friend was having it hard on our history paper today too. And guess what? All I thought was, "I want to show her the 3rd poem I did for Joo Won". When she's worried about the hard questions on the paper. It's not that I think the paper was easy, it was hard for me too, but I can't help but trying to show it to her. In the end I did not. I felt like if I ever did do it, she'll give me this surprise look and said, "We're in the middle of exam and that's all you could think of?" I don't want her to think that I'm too lazy or too smart. Simply because I'm not.
That's all about my exam problems. I don't think it have anything to do with exams now T.T ~
By the way, I decided to set up a new page for poems and short stories ^^ .
Saturday, February 19, 2011
Another composition
I wrote a short story of a modernize Alice. It was somewhat weird, Sasha told me. My Elle/Eli friend told me that it was a good, twisted and interesting version. I was planning on putting them on the school magazine and they told me that I should.
But somehow, I fell that I shouldn't. The look they gave me were like : It's interesting, but we're not sure if it's appropriate for the magazine, Not sure if the school would understand such different views, and etc.
I was really looking forward to it, you know? But I'm not too sure now. However, there's a thing called trying, right? Once I asked Elle about it, but it seems that these days he's been giving me silent treatment. He look at me as if saying, "If you think you want to do it, then do it. If not, then don't". Sure, that helps. Thanks a lot Elle. I wanted to ask Fritz but I'm too embarrassed to even let him read it. Well, to sum it all, only 4 human beings have read my story, not including Elle but my other unmentioned classmate and Ien.
I also tried to write a Haiku. But until now, I haven't get the comment from 'the expert' which is Sasha's dad. I wonder if it's too boring or bad that Sasha didn't want to tell me of it. Maybe she said she forgot to ask because it was sooo bad and she didn't want to break my heart for telling me so. Oh my fragile, fragile heart, if it was brittle, I'll be gone long long ago. Sasha should have just told me the truth, I would be sad for a while. But it'll only take a while anyway,... as if I'll let it drag on to me forever. She should know that much by now. But I don't blame her. Elle and Fritz told me that I've been keeping a lot of secrets and never tell anyone the whole truth. No lies, but not the truth either.
School had kept me busy these few weeks. I'm going to try out for Badminton, since I've missed softball. Of course, I would prefer essay competition or chess but I'm not sure if there's any competition for that this year. The government had reduced the amount of money to be supplied for education so since last year, no competition was held. It saddens me but there's nothing much I can do since letters and complaint aren't being heard. I'm still hoping for chess competition though. I want to play Elle/Eli girl ever since I heard she was good in it last month. But we never had the chance. I want to see who's better. It's personal really. I'm not in the chess club so off the record, I'm the best in the school right now ^^~. That's not really bragging, I'm only telling. Grr, I wish LaRich and Dev could stop chuckling right now. Fritz is giving me this big smile as if I'm lying. Ah, and yet again, Elle is keeping quiet. What's bothering him, I wonder.
I guess I should try and find out someday of Elle's unusual behaviour. It's really too odd but I can't really ask anyone since Fritz hates Elle and wouldn't care while LaRich and Dev would never dare to tell. The human beings wouldn't be able to know, of course since they don't even know that he existed. Thus, the only way is to confront him myself.
Once I'm free from the loads of work.
I even have to study for exam next week. Elle, faster come to your senses! WHo would help me study if you keep on doing this?
But somehow, I fell that I shouldn't. The look they gave me were like : It's interesting, but we're not sure if it's appropriate for the magazine, Not sure if the school would understand such different views, and etc.
I was really looking forward to it, you know? But I'm not too sure now. However, there's a thing called trying, right? Once I asked Elle about it, but it seems that these days he's been giving me silent treatment. He look at me as if saying, "If you think you want to do it, then do it. If not, then don't". Sure, that helps. Thanks a lot Elle. I wanted to ask Fritz but I'm too embarrassed to even let him read it. Well, to sum it all, only 4 human beings have read my story, not including Elle but my other unmentioned classmate and Ien.
I also tried to write a Haiku. But until now, I haven't get the comment from 'the expert' which is Sasha's dad. I wonder if it's too boring or bad that Sasha didn't want to tell me of it. Maybe she said she forgot to ask because it was sooo bad and she didn't want to break my heart for telling me so. Oh my fragile, fragile heart, if it was brittle, I'll be gone long long ago. Sasha should have just told me the truth, I would be sad for a while. But it'll only take a while anyway,... as if I'll let it drag on to me forever. She should know that much by now. But I don't blame her. Elle and Fritz told me that I've been keeping a lot of secrets and never tell anyone the whole truth. No lies, but not the truth either.
School had kept me busy these few weeks. I'm going to try out for Badminton, since I've missed softball. Of course, I would prefer essay competition or chess but I'm not sure if there's any competition for that this year. The government had reduced the amount of money to be supplied for education so since last year, no competition was held. It saddens me but there's nothing much I can do since letters and complaint aren't being heard. I'm still hoping for chess competition though. I want to play Elle/Eli girl ever since I heard she was good in it last month. But we never had the chance. I want to see who's better. It's personal really. I'm not in the chess club so off the record, I'm the best in the school right now ^^~. That's not really bragging, I'm only telling. Grr, I wish LaRich and Dev could stop chuckling right now. Fritz is giving me this big smile as if I'm lying. Ah, and yet again, Elle is keeping quiet. What's bothering him, I wonder.
I guess I should try and find out someday of Elle's unusual behaviour. It's really too odd but I can't really ask anyone since Fritz hates Elle and wouldn't care while LaRich and Dev would never dare to tell. The human beings wouldn't be able to know, of course since they don't even know that he existed. Thus, the only way is to confront him myself.
Once I'm free from the loads of work.
I even have to study for exam next week. Elle, faster come to your senses! WHo would help me study if you keep on doing this?
Sunday, February 13, 2011
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)