Holding on

 A lot have happened last year, but I can't seem to recall most of them.

Major events would be:

1. I quit school.
2. Lemon visited. Twice
3. Lemon proposed.

No Reassurance

Despite taking a month long holiday, I didn't feel like I caught a break.

     The thing with Gari made me think a lot. Convincing someone that things will get better makes me hate myself since that's an everyday effort, just to believe it myself. So it was not really surprising to me, when I asked for OssanFruit's help.

Child to Man

In the midst of my never ending headaches, emotional turmoil and all that makes up my on-going bad days, I stumbled upon this:

The momentous laws of induction between currents and between currents and magnets were discovered by Michael Faraday in 1831-82. Faraday was asked: "What is the use of this discovery?" He answered: "What is the use of a child - it grows to be a man."

Introduction to Mathematics

by Alfred North Whitehead

The Stars Leaked

I had the most wonderful dream yesterday.

Hime, Chi, Nao and I decided to finally have our destination travels. We took a flight to somewhere and when we reached the airport, Bear picked us up. I was relieved when he did, amazed too that he drove. I kept on talking about how he never drives in Malaysia and it was odd to see him driving now. My girlfriends were shy, quiet and awkward so it was just me blabbering to Bear while he sat and drove on with increasing annoyance at me.

Then the car broke down. He pulled it over and went to check the engine while the rest of us just waited. Chi went to him and started helping him out and he gave Chi some engine lessons and they bonded.

We were curious so we went and peeked.
At that moment, Bear hit some kind of cord or pipe. There was a loud explosion.
But out of it came billion of stars and sun - the whole galaxy.

It was such a beautiful sight.

Then I woke up.

Try-Hards Together, ok?

First - a little music box tune that describes my current mood:

I was working on mafia game and banner earlier today with Screw. Oh right, did I ever tell you that watching Screw work on photoshop stuff is relaxing?

New Day New New and New?

 

So hmmm where did I left you guys off?

Catching the Worm

So I've been like on a roll with my new fanfic since these past months.

Updated story | Not a Girl, Not a Woman, Chapter 14: Early Bird Catches Worm: https://t.co/kFIorJNFWh #dcmk #fanfiction -Enjoy- （‐＾▽＾‐）

— ◎theSilentReader◎ (@aa_dono) January 6, 2016

It felt good to be able to write again.

To Bloom in Adversity

“When he asked my grandmother if she would mind being poor, she said she would be happy just to have her daughter and himself: 'If you have love, even plain water is sweet.” —Jung Chang 

I read Wild Swans back in Standard 5. I was 11 years old. I read it discreetly because the book was in the adult collection, meaning it wasn't by recommendation that I found it, nor did anyone expect that I would have been interested in reading it.

I was though.

For You

So...... hello.

Wow I have been depressing. I hate that part of me but it's good that it's not like that now. Whne I wake up this morning feeling so light, the first thing I wanted to do was message or call my friends. Then I realize my phone died, and my charger, unfortunately went missing again.

So dear friends who knew me, since only people who really are my closest friends actually knew about this blog, thank you for putting up with me.

Also to my sisters. I don't really know how to say sweet words but you two probably know what I wanted to express.

I love you all and that'll never change.

Small Surprise

My baby cousin, Dan told me “Auntie, don’t give up”. Then he chant it repeatedly, playing I’m not sure what. I don’t know which cartoon he watched, but that took me by surprise.

Even a kid gave me life hints. Or was I hearing things?

Are we forever busy? - Nation | The Star Online

December makes one think about time and what we have done or not done over the past year.

It's December and we know that everyone is saying: “Wah, December already. The year just flew by, didn't it?”

The analytical person in me will reply: “You repeat yourself every year. I don't think it went any faster. It's just a perception.”

Time, of course, cannot move faster or slower. We are, after all, blessed with the same amount of it daily.

The new Kuros'

I think Huninis changed, a bit.
     A positive change.
            Alhamdulillah (Thank you Allah).

So... guess what?
We got our Kuro back!!!!
   We => My siblings and I.

What's Kuro? Heh.heh.heh.

Oh Sweet Sonnet ヾ(￣ー￣)X(^∇^)ゞ

Wrote a SONNET for literature class. Themed love. So I wrote with grandpa in mind. I missed him.

Well anyway, something quite touching happened.
Not the biggest of matter, not anything big and important, but something sweet.
It's like eating red-bean pau which someone had put some hazelnut inside. And it caught you by surprise, and you'll end up smiling.
        That sort of sweet and touching thing. Haha.

Literary Line-up

Pre-Calculus and Introduction to Literature, that's what I've learnt after the 2nd week of this semester. For some reason, the other 2 classes will be delayed. And here I am, mourning for the upcoming race of replacement classes. (┳Д┳)

So anyway,
          Due to many factors I wish not to type out - basically because I'm least diligent this morning - I've gotten myself energy bars! And that was for breakfast!

Ok ok, I don't really have much to share this time.
  But I'm just so super excited to read these: (the line-up of this semester's read a.k.a literature) Ｏ(≧∇≦)Ｏ

Desk makeover

I've been feeling down last sem, and got into a state where I don't even know how to cheer myself up.

So this sem, I'm doing a makeover on my desk.
  This way, I don't need to access the net just to see these bishounens that could cheer me up ^^

Lookie: behold!

Just finished decorating this an hour ago :D

So, what do you think? Hehe~ ok, I'm gonna go back to studyin :)

Later~

Fig & Olive

Hey you guys again! Haha, sorry I haven't been updating much when I said I would last few months. When was it, I wonder? Haha.. (just so you know, this is called a guilty laugh- tee hee, an an embarrassed laugh- not that it's necessary to tell..)

Ok, in any case, once upon a time, I did mention that I was going to recap things right? Well, as for now, let's recap the days I spent during before the time I started my Foundation course. Yup^^ the short month I went working.

Oh, by the way, I've finished my 1st semester, currently on semester holiday. And will be continuing my 2nd sem next week.

Here goes:

Welcome Ramadhan

Opps~ I know it's a bit late.

But Happy Ramadhan to all Muslims out there. Let's strive to be a better ummah, and let's chase ibadah till we drop ;)

Another Step

Well, hello everyone^^ How long has it been since I last posted? .. A month?! Oh even worse, my last real post was on February. That's 4 months ago. So... did you miss me? Blee, coming from you guys, I don't think you do.

          In 4 months, a lot have happened. Duh, that's just obvious right? Unless I live in a cave though. But I do feel that cavemen adventures are even more interesting in 4 months. Well, that's what I feel, not like I ever actually meet any cavemen before. Maybe it'll be interesting if I could date one. Tee hee.

So, any idea what I'll be talking 'bout today?
          First, let me do a recap. (Now it sounds like I'm actually giving a speech - lol) Well, I went to work after I got my driving license. Oh yea, I got my driving license!!! Thrilling isn't it^^ huhu~ Cool, right? Or, did I already told you guys bout that? Dang! That's why you're not jumping in excitement like I do. Or maybe you're just jealous~ :p

Oh, back to the story.
          So, I went to work part time. I am a part-timer but I actually worked full time. Imagine my pay~ hehe, plus all the overtime, I'm basically draining my boss, since she have to pay me higher than her full-timers. I'm bad, aren't I? Whatever, I only worked there for 2 months anyway. Haha, cause' after that I enroll in University^^
Enough the straying,
               Ok, I'm not really typing this to share those working time where I have to smile and greet my customers all day. There were some interesting events but let's just skip that until another time when I feel like recapping that.

So, as the picture has changed, you should have able to guess, right? I'm in university now^^ huhu. Ok, yes, maybe I'm over excited. Maybe. Maybe not. No, honestly, I AM!! I'm already here for a month but that doesn't really decrease my excitement. I totally love the library. They call it IRC (Information Resource Centre) though.

Information Resource Centre, University of Technology PETRONAS

The inside view (night)

The outer view  (night)

   
           I'm pretty much relaxed now, that's why I'm a bit hyper. I've just finished my test so I planned to do some more studying but then I'm too happy to even focus. Thus, I decided to update this blog to throw all the unspoken words. Duh, you can't really scream in the library.

          So, all that typing earlier was just introduction. Haha, tired of it? What to do, that's just how I ramble. Let's get back to business.

          When I first came, most of the seniors here - my orientation facilitators - I think, are good people. It made me wonder why everyone was worrying 'bout social issues. Well, that is until I saw myself what happen after orientation. Good, kind, caring seniors do exist. However, the opposite probably exist in larger numbers. The numbers that I was blind to when I first came. Well, not just seniors though. Even my peers have their social 'misguidance' I guess. Haha, what a way to put it.

          Oh, anyway, I was involved in the self-reflection night (I think they phrase it wrongly - in any case, it's what we know as Malam Kebudayaan). I was the narrator for our sket. Or pantomime. I'm not too sure what it is actually. I met a few interesting people, some of who I befriended. I seriously love them. They're fun and sometimes, although it's not as how it was with Sasha, our conversation will be mind provoking. And you know I love that sort of conversation. I have to admit, I thought I won't encounter this sort of person, but I did :)

          Oh, then I met Beras friend. Have I told you guys bout him? He's a friend I met while working. He did say before that his friends are fun but I was never too convinced how fun is that. Afterall, my degree of fun have always been different than the rest. But they're fun in a way :) Although honestly, I don't understand most of their conversation, but just listening to it is relaxing. Not that I could explain to you why anyway.

          Oh the assignments? To be honest, I think my secondary school gave even more homework than the lecturers here. Still, it's pretty tough and energy-draining to finish up the assignments. I guess that's cause' there's so much reading, researching and thinking to be done in one piece of paper. That's a shiver.

           As for clubs, I joined Rakan Masjid, literally translated as "Friends of the Mosque". :) And, there's an 'and' there. Haha. I'm also part of SIFE. and HOT. Well, you can google SIFE so don't let me do any amateur explaination 'bout it. HOT stands for Heart of Tronoh. Tronoh is a place, by the way. The University is in Tronoh. And HOT is the university bulletin/magazine. I'm the reporter^^. Well, pray I can still study excellently.

This is my leap. I hope I do very well. Pray for me. 

            I'm having fun everyday. I mean it. Only, I'm also very tired everyday. Haha. Well, I think I'm pretty toned down a bit so I should resume studying. Later, guys^^. And girls. Hehe.

P/S : by the way, I do not own the pictures. Since I don't have a camera, I just 'borrowed' the pictures. Credit goes to the owner.

Rambling Events

So, here's another start of my random rambling again. For those who had been continuously reading them, seriously, THANKS^^.

Hmm... let's talk about recent event:

          On Valentine's Day (14/2), I've been invited to Chii's house. At first, "they" (Chii and NaO) told me that we're (myself, them, and Hime) eating out. Pizza. So, I told them, "Let me ask Pakcik Damur if I have Driving License on that day". So I went and ask and Pakcik Damur and he said "Nope, no class that day". But then he ask me why, and whether I made plans etc. Yeah, I said. So this pakcik gave me this one look that explain it all- he thought I have a boyfriend. Figures, who had a date with girlfriends on Valentine? Haha, but I don't celebrate Valentine so it's just another odinary day to me anyway^^. I guess he's right to be worried. But he should really not jump to conclusion.

          Whatever, so anyway, they also said that we'll be baking some chocolates too. Yay, I cheered. Never have I bake any chocolate. Heh. But when I arrived, they were sitting around with Chii playing her games [don't remember the title]. Buuh, where's the so called chocolate enthusias? So then, we goofed around for not-exactly a bit, if you know what I meant. After a while -don't remember who-, someone brought up about the pizza. But by then, Chii's mother were coming back. So we thought of just ordering the pizza. Heh, typical. But DUM DUM DUM, Chii's mother came home and made lunch for us. So screw the pizza. Haha. Usually things don't turn out as planned anyway^^.

          I kinda', although I don't think so, forced Chii to let me play her PS3. Hehe, so I guess, because she let me play 'em, the whole trip turns out super worthwhile. I only played one game though - Sengoku; BASARA. I read them somewhere when I was researching about Sanada Juuyushi. Heh, so OBVIOUSLY, I played Sanada Yukimura's character. I played "easy" coz I'm a beginner and such, but I won^^ hehe~ SO either way, just when I was excited about wanting to play Final Fantasy [whatever number I don't know], NaO's dad arrived. I'm going back home with her so.. aww, kinda sigh quietly T^T.

That's that.

          Then I had my driving lesson the next next day. Buu, it didn't really turn out that well. Kinda' embarrassing, if I had to admit. But I won't be defeated by a few embarrassing moments. Who cares if most of the instructor presents were chuckling away. Blergh, I'm a newbie so it's only natural not to have any knowledge they called common. Buh, what's so common about it anyway? *sulking*

          So on yesterday's lesson, I improved greatly. Although of course not as great as the skillful them, but as someone who starts from ZERO, my improvement was commendable, said the motorcycle instructor though.

Well, that's for me to keep in my memoirs.

Until some other time later, JA!

Learner Driving License

Now, this felt weird~

          Hello there, everyone! Today's my sis birthday but I wished her late~ haha, what a bad sister =.=ll   Not that I could help it. No, it was entirely my fault.

Happy Birthday, Siena!!

          But actually I'm not gonna post about that. Wait, did my way of speaking sounds cruel? Che, since when do I know how to be all nicey doey. I think I'm fine the way I am.

          The other day, I had my driving class. I was nervous actually. Who knew learning would require nerve! But after the constant reminder of Pakcik Damur (so I wish to call him that) about the clutch, I've gotten the hang of it. He told me I was a fast learner too^^. Oh, cut with the praises!! Hehe~
   Euu, I sound so... what's the word?? Obnoxious, ne?
                 

"Praises are poison to the character"

Where have I heard that before?

 Back to the main topic:

         But, it didn't break-down the nervousness. Only increases my tension. But Ah! Then I met a familiar face! She didn't look my way but we were so close. I thought of greeting her but just by thinking about that made me not concentrate on what Pakcik Damur was saying. And it got to me, what if that pakcik gets mad because I wasn't paying attention? I thought, oh well, that girl doesn't even realize I'm there and she seems preoccupied with her lesson so it would do us both good not to start talking now right?

          So, with her being there, I decided not to show how nervous I am. After all, I love to act like everything was no big deal. Heh. Pretty disgusting, eh? But if there's anything I like about my character, this would be one of them. By pretending that things are not difficult, I would worked my ass of to make sure it won't look difficult. That would include change my way of thinking, my attitude towards that particular work and the strive for perfection. Although, it's a facade I have to put up with, usually when this part of me surfaces, my work tend to be extremely well done, exceeding people expectations. Too bad, it rarely shows up. So, I'm proud to have this side of me. It proves that "When there's a will, there's a way".

Though, it did not help with my lack of will to do anything.

          So, the lesson went on. I've gotten the hang of this whole driving business after an hour plus. Oh, and there's actually another familiar face that I saw there. But she's far from me I doubt she saw me. Well, actually they're my schoolmates. But we're not super close. Still, I though I should say hello. Just as Pakcik Damur decided that "That's all for today", he also decided that I'm driving us home. So, before I had the chance to tell him that I wanted to greet my friends, I was all "WHAT?!" It was my first day! He can't possibly want me to start driving on the road?

         Pakcik Damur then grinned and said, "What? It shouldn't be a big deal, right? I'm sure you'll do fine". No, I don't think I would do fine. No, no, no, was the only thing in my head as I stared at the pakcik, without answering. But the "Shouldn't be a big deal" were echoing in my head over and over and over again until the pitiful poor "no" wasn't heard anymore. So I smiled back at the pakcik and said, "Ok". He looked shocked that instant. Ah, so he thought I would say no. Then he continued, "It wouldn't be a problem because you have your Learner License with you. Are you sure you can do it?" If he wasn't a pakcik, I would have bite his head!! What are you doing, stepping on my pride?!! I'd look pathetic if I said "No" right then. So I just smile again and told him "I'm okay with it. After all basically my instructor is with me, right?" There you go! My counter attack.

          Pakcik Damur grinned again and said "Let's go".

Expecting anything? Well, it didn't really turn out as I planned in my head, the "Heh. It was nothing". It was something. Oh, the nerve!
But, it was okay. At leas Pakcik Damur said it was. And it's not like I made any mistake. All I did was drive slow.. very slow though. Haha, lame right? It was my first try! You can't expect me to be like those fantasy manga style character that seems to do everything perfectly! Hey, real life perfections need practice and perseverance.

So, I got home later and felt totally content!