... I guess I need this right now ...
Nanka... kore wa owari janai yo ne?
Yosh!
If I could write a million words to someone right now, it'd be Elle. Too bad, he probably can't read it. Nah, he's smart, so of course he can read it!
Still..
He won't receive it, desho ne?
Anyway, whatever went through my mind earlier? It's still too early to give in. Just a couple more years.
Then what?
I might never recover. :/
The feelings that I have now might not change. I probably have to live with this disgust, and all negativity.
Dakedo... Nishikado-san did say:
I will only live once. And die once. Even if there's a lot of things that I can never forget or I can never exclude myself from...
Even if I'm bound to the thing I hate the most forever, life moves in circles. If I don't hurry up and catch up to those wheels, I might be flat on the continuous sinking muddy path.
Maybe if I catch up to those wheels, I could ditch it when I reach the not so muddy path.
Or maybe the wheel will break and the whole carriage fall down, and I'm finally free.
I won't know if I stayed flat on the ground and don't get up, right?
No matter how many times we’re close to dying or rotting awayThere will be no endIt finally begins
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